O Lord, You have searched me and known me. You know my sitting down and rising up; You understand my thought afar off…

For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works. And that my soul knows very well.

My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they are all written, The days fashioned for me, When as yet there were none of them.

How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them!…

Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me, and know my anxieties; And see if there is any wicked thing in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

Psalm 139:1-2, 13-17, 23-24

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My Child Within

Dearest Child of Mine,

They say you’re not “you” but “me”; a part of “my” body that I can do with as I please. But are “you” really “me?”

Although I can freely move my arms and legs at will, I simply cannot move yours. Your kick within always takes me by surprise. I easily turn my body, but you are the one that turns yours. Yes, I control my motor skills, but yours I cannot. Are you really me?

You and I have unique genetic DNA with yours being very different than mine. The map that created you is not the same map that created me. Are you really me?

Or am I your nurturer from the day of your conception until you come of age?

Dearest Child of Mine, I promise that while you remain within me that I will give you oxygen for life. Then once we are face to face, I will ensure the air you breathe is good. As best I can, I will protect you from harm from this day forward. I will eat well while you remain within to ensure you get all the vitamins and nutrients you need to grow. Once you are born, I will feed you only the best.

My womb is your cradle where I will speak and sing to you often. Then one day soon, I will cradle you in my arms.

One thing is certain, either way, you will be held close to my heart. Love, Mom

—Karen, 1996